She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
