dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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