I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
