dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
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I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
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I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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