Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize
