making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
