they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i would punch a child for taco bell
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
