There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
