Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
