she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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