there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Randomize