is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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