wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize