She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
