She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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