last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize