...so i touched it.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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