Midget sex pt 2 tonight
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
