I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
