Texts From Last Night

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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??

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  (541): I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!?? http://tfl.nu/tgko
  Replies (8) Good night (506) Bad night (2273) Order T-Shirt
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  (752): View more from California

  What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?

  (209): View more from California

  I think the two go hand in hand.

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  (752): What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall? (209): I think the two go hand in hand. http://tfl.nu/xxhp
  Replies (73) Good night (1009) Bad night (5867)
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  (818): View more from California

  Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics

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  (818): Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics http://tfl.nu/kq58
  Replies (44) Good night (1525) Bad night (4234) Order T-Shirt
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.

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  (540): Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply. http://tfl.nu/723h
  Replies (20) Good night (5177) Bad night (919) Order T-Shirt
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.

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  (205): The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with. http://tfl.nu/ihrj
  Replies (13) Good night (3828) Bad night (1055) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.

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  (609): My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count. http://tfl.nu/d5s2
  Replies (14) Good night (4962) Bad night (1400) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...

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  (315): Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime... http://tfl.nu/v3a6
  Replies (7) Good night (2063) Bad night (1035) Order T-Shirt
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.

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  (719): You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job. http://tfl.nu/yqtc
  Replies (19) Good night (3227) Bad night (1270) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?

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  (310): Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head? http://tfl.nu/rn01
  Replies (1) Good night (2107) Bad night (841) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.

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  (970): I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night. http://tfl.nu/sjta
  Replies (4) Good night (2355) Bad night (675) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..

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  (203): I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground.. http://tfl.nu/w7v0
  Replies (2) Good night (1033) Bad night (434) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.

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  (519): And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication. http://tfl.nu/rgq1
  Replies (3) Good night (932) Bad night (377) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.

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  (760): He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes. http://tfl.nu/l52c
  Replies (4) Good night (1290) Bad night (380) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.

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  (425): Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming. http://tfl.nu/qdqz
  Replies (1) Good night (761) Bad night (300) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.

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  (415): Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me. http://tfl.nu/brt4
  Replies (5) Good night (896) Bad night (197)

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