I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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