awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
