Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
