I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
