I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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