half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Of course I have a pirate flag
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
