the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Randomize