Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
