tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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