I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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