WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Randomize
