hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
