make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
