I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize
