You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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