Midget sex pt 2 tonight
She said her name was "party"
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
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I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
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Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
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