the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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