Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I got her a Nickelback box set.
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he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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