Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
