But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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