And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
