I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
