that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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