I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
