We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize