I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
