I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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