OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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