I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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