he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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